Category Archives: Everything Else

The War on Terrorism The U.S. is airdropping food to Afghanistan at the same time that we’re bombing them. I’ve thought of a way we can better combine our collective efforts to fight and feed. You know those chain burger … Continue reading →

Nothing much new today in the “War on Terrorism”. I would like to point out, though, that I havn’t heard much from Microsoft since September 11th. I’m not meaning court battles or restitution (or more appropriately, lack thereof). What I … Continue reading →

I havn’t updated this blog in a while. First there were billable jobs to attend to, then Mr. Mom hours started taking their toll, then on Septermber 11th, the terrorist attacks on the WTC and Pentagon set me in front … Continue reading →

I was, shall we say, indisposed, when I heard my wife call from the other room asking if I had gone to bed. “No,” I replied. “I’m indisposed.” “Oh, I thought I heard you in the bedroom.” “No, I’m indisposed.” … Continue reading →

Mr. Mom takes care of 15-month old daughter – Scene One: (wife) “You fed her plums!?” (me) “What!? It was in the cabinet!” (wife) “There’s all kinds of fruits in the cabinet! You chose plums!?” (me) “It was a dark … Continue reading →

Things you don’t want to hear… “I was taking out the garbage and I remembered I wanted to call you.” Thanks Mom!

The people who make a difference are the ones who get bored. – Brian Eno I imagine it’s like the metamorphosis of a caterpillar into a butterfly. Bear with me… You’re all happy being a caterpillar, walking around and eating … Continue reading →

Just when you think you’ve seen everything in the grocery… Half-popped popcorn kernals. In a can. Factory-sealed fresh. You know the kernels in your microwave bag that didn’t quite have enough oomph to pop out of the popcorn shell and … Continue reading →

Cosmic Catch-22 – A married man taking care of a baby is the most desirable to a woman. Same man, no ring or baby, is just another guy who wouldn’t stand a chance with her. Explain that one, Darwin.

So, we go into a fancy restaurant and the receptionist asks how many in our party. “Two, and a baby,” I reply. The waiter asks that we follow him and we proceed to walk about twenty miles to the back … Continue reading →

Every year that goes by it seems my electric shaver gets more and more use further away from my beard. My beard is a little tough anyway, so much that I considered rigging a gas-powered weed-whacker as a substitute shaver … Continue reading →

The Pop-Tart breakfast consortium got me again! Insidious, I tell you. A grown man walking out of the grocery with a double-pack of Power Puff Girls Pop-Tarts – purple frosted with brightly colored candy stars and characters on top. And … Continue reading →

If an alien spaceship landed on the road in front of you and the occupants stepped out and approached you to join them on their return into space, would you go? Remember “Close Encounters of the Third Kind?” Richard Dreyfuss’s … Continue reading →

One whole grocery aisle dedicated to potato chips. Another for colas (or pop, or soft drinks, whatever you like to call them). Yet another just for breakfast cereals – many of which come out with special “limited edition” packaging named … Continue reading →

I always know what year it is. So long as it’s not within a few days of the beginning or end, I know the month. Oftentimes I’m confused as to what day it is. If I didn’t wear a watch … Continue reading →

Reality TV shows… I’ve never been to bootcamp. I’ve never had to survive being stranded on an island or stuck in the Australian outback. Temptation Island? Yeah, right. Unless you’re Angela Lansbury it’s doubtful you’ll really be solving a murder … Continue reading →

Okay, so I let my backyard grass grow a little high. There were fox-tails waving in the wind and my dogs looked like they were roaming the African veldt when I let them out to do their personal doggie work. … Continue reading →

I’ve heard they’ve got spray-on tans now. You go into a booth and spray nozzles hose you down in a golden shower (of tanning solution). I wonder if they make little touch-up bottles that you can dab on an elbow … Continue reading →

So, I’m going through the McDonald’s drive-thru, and I order my wife a Coke-Float. Pretty simple, really. The first thing they ask me is, “What do you want in that?” Err… “Coke.” They rang it up as a “Rootbeer-Float with … Continue reading →

Cold hearted orb that rules the night, Removes the colours from our sight. Red is grey and yellow white, But we decide which is right. And which is an illusion? -Moody Blues song lyrics Sounds an awful lot like freelancing … Continue reading →