Category Archives: Everything Else

My wife bought me some cola from the grocery. The label reads: Genuine Faygo Dee-licious&#8482 Rock & Rye! Artificially Flavored Creme Cola I didn’t check before drinking it. I guess I got pretty lucky it was the Dee-licious&#8482 version.

Insurance companies suck. Okay, to be fair, maybe they are just the purest form of “sell your mother down the river for a buck” capitalism. They’ve bypassed the whole supply and demand concept unless you make it supply and demand-that-you-have-it-in-order-to-live. … Continue reading →

Okay, by who’s standards is today not really yesterday? I mean, I haven’t been to sleep yet so it’s still a physical day for me. I live in Indiana so it only complicates matters more with the non observance of … Continue reading →

Good things to teach your 1-year-old daughter: “Mom-ma.” “Dad-da.” “Patty-cake.” Bad things to teach your 1-year-old daughter: “@#$%^& Microsoft!” “[ring] Hello? [pause] No, I do not want to switch my long distance. Now kindly please [censor] yourself and [censor] [censor] … Continue reading →

I got to my desk at a client’s where I do some technical support work. Sitting on my chair was a streaky colored printout of a report, completely illegible in a wide stripe down the center of the page. A … Continue reading →

My daughter has gorgeous long eyelashes which my wife always points out to people came from me. After she says that, I like to chime in seriously with, “Yes, they come in great when I go out in drag.” I’m … Continue reading →

As a special tribute to the Fourth of July, in the wee hours of the morning, I blew up my website! This leads me to the time proven addage that you get what you pay for. I pay $99 per … Continue reading →

The Fourth of July needs a cute cuddly mascot. Christmas has Santa Claus, Easter has that whole bunny thing going, and St. Patrick’s day has those impish little leprechauns. Okay, I know – what about Uncle Sam? I’m as patriotic … Continue reading →

My daughter cut her first tooth recently. What was a cute, “Oh, look she’s biting my nose!” is now more like, “AHHHH! Somebody please detach this baby from my face!” It’s amazing how much that miniscule amount of enamel affects … Continue reading →

Half my readers complained that I had a short posting yesterday. I think there are only about two people reading these things so it’s only one person. I don’t know whether that makes me feel better, or worse.

The doctor told me I have eye strain. I came home and researched it on the Internet for about 10 hours. I still can’t figure it out. full movies onlinedownload movie makerdownload moviedownload lolicon moviesdownload latest moviesdownload ipod moviesfree one … Continue reading →

The Learning Channel (TLC) on cable airs a show called Junkyard Wars. Teams race against each other to build fantastic machines out of anything they can find in an old scrap heap and then accomplish some task – like chucking … Continue reading →

A woman where I work wants to play the “Imperial March” when she walks down the aisle to her betrothed. This was the omnious tune that played whenever the villainous Darth Vader walked into a room in the Star Wars … Continue reading →

My wife and I bought a toy for our one-year-old daughter tonight. It’s a little stuffed dog that plays a recorded sound whenever you shake it or move it – or look at it cross-eyed, for that matter. As we … Continue reading →

Time is inversely proportional to the desire for it’s passage.

Biting Insect Repelling Wrist Band – $2.49 Sunscreen with Insect Repellent – $7.99 (Can’t be too careful!) Anti-Itch Concentrated Lotion – $5.99 (%$#^@& immune mosquitos!) Bactine Antiseptic Squeeze Bottle – $3.99 (thorn bushes) Band-Aid Bandages – $2.79 (lots of thorn … Continue reading →

My wife claims she warned me in a calm monotone voice. “Get up. Now. There is a spider in the bed.” I heard something entirely different. “GET UP NOW! A LARGE HAIRY ALIEN SPIDER IS CRAWLING UP YOUR LEG!” My … Continue reading →

I saw three young girls walking through my neighborhood while I was driving home. The first one was wearing shiny tight red vinyl pants that covered all the way from her ankles up to her anorexic hips where the material … Continue reading →

This is the ICQ message I received a few moments ago when I sat down at the computer. kenr: btw, i’ve discovered a _great_ new browser! Netscape 3.01 with Java and Javascript turned off… 🙂 The effects of code glut … Continue reading →

Where did customer service go? I wrote the hosting company for my website’s domain when I was having a technical problem with the code for a page. I had already spent a number of hours figuring out the problem and … Continue reading →