FCC and Department of Transportation to Regulate Radio Station Playlists

In an interesting development this week, the FCC and Department of Transportation have partnered to create a bill allowing them to regulate radio station playlists. Citing a precedent from Fort Wayne, Indiana, officials say, “We were lucky there were no fatalities from the nearly dozen traffic accidents that immediately occurred after heavy-metal song ‘Lick it Up’ by rockers KISS was immediately followed by country star Garth Brook’s ‘Friends in Low Places’.” The FCC chairman will not officially comment that the Department of Health might also come onboard to back the new bill. An unofficial statement from the Surgeon General, however, states, “If we can tell people to wait two hours after eating before swimming to avoid cramping and drowning, it is not a far reach to expect radio stations to avoid the kind of mental whiplash that can occur by immediately playing country after heavy metal.” In the meantime, public officials encourage drivers to avoid stations that advertise a “variety” of music and stick to “pure genre” stations instead.